“In my bio it says, ‘All things pretty, ugly, and squishy,’ which is very much what I’m interested in, visually and sonically,” Zhan explains via Zoom from her flat in London.
“I’m really kind of shy as [most] animators are, and sort of uncomfortable talking about myself,” the filmmaker and animator adds. “But in my films, I feel like I can be open and vulnerable about these forbidden topics.”
Alice and Teddy’s naked bodies sway and slap as we hear their past memories rushing around them. It’s slippery, it’s slobbery, it’s… Squishy. Very squishy.
Zhan depicts their limbs falling off, their faces melting and fusing together using a variety of mediums: globs, drips, and smears of oil, paint, charcoal, and eraser. The result tells a story that goes beyond the awkward pleasantries Alice and Teddy are exchanging.
“The visuals of the film are their inner thoughts and emotions, and what their bodies are experiencing, which is this kind of intense, animalistic memory of each other,” Zhan explains.
Zhan is no stranger to exploring and capturing inner worlds in unexpected and visually arresting ways. And this is her second time at Sundance—she won the Jury Prize for Best Animated Short in 2019 for Reneepoptosis. (The film’s description—in part, “three Renees go on a quest to find God, who is also Renee”—belies the joyful madness that happens during its 10-minute runtime.)
What is new is how this film was made: in collaboration with other creatives.
“In my work, it’s important for me to grow as a person,” she explains. “And one way to do that, I think, is by facing my fears in my films.”
While that’s typically meant making her fears the subject of the work (like the film where “a woman turns into a black hole because she’s afraid of time passing”), this time she looked at a fear that affected her process and her dreams.